I recently watched a TEDx presentation by Dr. Lisa Bliss entitled ‘No Failure in Trying’. Dr. Bliss is an accomplished physician who has run over 70 ultra-marathons and won Badwater. She takes the old question, “What would you do if you knew you would succeed?” and asks us to look at it differently:

“If you knew you could not fail at something, what is the point of the attempt? I think the best question is – What would you attempt if you thought you would fail, but there was a glimmer of hope or a chance in hell that perhaps you would succeed. What then would you do? The first question presumes that the possibility of failure is something we should try to avoid. And the second question presumes that the possibility of failure is going to be there, but that we should still try. Because there is no failure in trying…

Lisa speaks of training intensively for a wild pursuit for which she is pretty certain she will fail. She speaks of overcoming ego and deciding to tell friends and family of her goal – opening herself up to embarrassment and hurt pride. She speaks of learning to look at failure as a necessary and beautiful part of life.

{Dr. Bliss doing her self-supported Badwater with a 240lb cart}

Most of us grasp the Yin&Yang, the Light&Dark, the Good&Evil that balances our world. We come to accept (begrudgingly perhaps) that sadness is as integral to our life as happiness. But looking at – and truly honoring – failure as the necessary, flip side of success is a tricky mental exercise.

And yet, it’s so obvious. We fail from Day 1. Infants struggle (and fail) to turn over, but slowly they learn to. Toddlers try (and fail) to walk, but they get up and keep trying. As parents, we tell our kids daily – “Just try it…Don’t be scared!”  But do we follow our own advice?

It’s been 2 years since I ‘failed’ in my Australia race. I can still feel the bitterness of watching the other racers cross the finish line. I was so disappointed in myself. I was so incredibly embarrassed. Ok, so you failed – NOW what?

I came home with a vengeance and trained for my first 50miler. That race felt so good, I signed up for a harder one with elevation. That forced me out to the mountains where I started learning the trails. At first I just followed my running friends who always picked the course and led the way, but slowly I began to venture out by myself. Just me and a map for hours – getting lost constantly, always coming home scraped up and with stories -but rediscovering a love of independence and being in the forest that I had forgotten since childhood. That incredible feeling turned into a business idea and Run Pretty Far was born.

When I connected all those dots the other day it was truly an ‘aha’ moment. Is this string of events too far-fetched? Perhaps…but I think not. I also feel pretty certain that if I had ‘succeeded’ in Australia my cockiness meter would have been through the roof and I would have been content to just coast with my running for a while. A different story that I’ll never know would have emerged – but frankly, I like the one I’m living.  I like where that failure got me, and I like the hunger that it still fuels in me to do better and be more.

Now don’t get me wrong – I’m not looking for any ‘life lessons’ this time around. I want a win – pure and simple. But I’m glad that I’ve forced myself to look at failure through this lens and re-purpose its value in my life.  As a mom and in my relationships, I have tiny failures everyday but even those are nothing but an opportunity to stop, breathe, and do better the very next time.

So go ahead – dream big, then fail bigger. Lick your wounds, then stand tall and let your next success be even sweeter….

xoxo, Jenn

**Please note – Wednesday is the last day for Mom’s Day shipping.***

http://womensrunning.com/blog/

Congrats to Women’s Running on 50 gorgeous, informative issues!

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I share this next antidote as a follow up to my last post (Perpetuem Snow-Cones) about savoring the little things in life or perhaps it’s just a submission to the old ‘Kids say the darnest things’ show.  I cracked open the new Women’s Running magazine to our page and asked Colin  - “Do you see anything special on this page?”  That boy is RPF’s most diligent helper so I knew he would zero in on our gear. Instead he exclaimed, “Raisins!!” in sheer delight over the SunMaid box featured next to us. No offense to raisins, but Colin this is national press for Momma’s baby brand!! Nope, he was not particularly impressed. We threw the issue on the desk and marched off to the kitchen for a snack of raisins instead. Thanks SunMaid for that little moment with my (increasingly) big boy.

What is Perpetuem? It’s a sustained energy, complete nutrition powder that you mix with water for endurance events when you need a balanced source of calories flowing through your system – fat, carbs, protein all the good stuff in one magic powder.

I finally came around to Perp at the North Face 50 Miler in San Fran. At two of the aid stations I made a tall, cold bottle of the stuff and felt a calm of hydration and strong energy come over me. I remember the next 10 miles or so after each bottle being amazing. I messaged my friend and ultrarunning super-vet Howard after the race and told him I now had a ‘love affair with Perpetuem’. He laughed and told me to take it easy….my love affair was sure to go sour when the temps were 110 and I was chocking down the hot, thick, cakey liquid.

Fast forward to my last real training run for Jordan. In 3 days, we did 20m-30m-20m. The 30m day was about 8 or 9,000 elevation gain. Not being a numbers junkie, I honestly can’t remember.  That whole day I was feeling sluggish and generally in kind of a funk. Nothing seemed to come easily and I started racking my brain – had a I under-trained, had I over-trained, did I suck?  No Jenn, it’s just another day on the mountain and they are not always pure bliss. About 6 hours in and tired and drained from the beating sun (what can I say, us WA state residents are whimps) we came upon a summit that was still covered in snow. George was low on water and it only took a second for us to start scraping off the dirty snow and getting to the pristine, white beauty underneath. Handfuls of cold, clean snow – we dug in.  Snow in the mouth, snow in our flasks, and melting snow shaken (not stirred) with Perpetuem. We made Perpetuem snow-cones on the top of the mountain on a random Monday afternoon in April.

We joked, we laughed, we made plans to bring up strawberry syrup and make real Hawaiian snow-cones. All frustration was forgotten and the day was alive – over a seemingly dirty handful of snow. Such a tiny thing in life can help you turn a corner.

{happier moments after the snow-cones}

It reminded me of the last time I was in Australia and the days were 120 degrees with suffocating humidity and not a leaf for shade. Unbearable is the only word for that kind of heat. And yet bear it we did….but when an insignificant breeze would happen to blow past we would savor it and feel every touch of the wind on our skin. A breeze that we wouldn’t have noticed under normal circumstances became a gift straight from God in the outback.

The world is full of humble miracles just waiting to be appreciated. It is always the little things that take hold of my heart and so rarely the big ones. As I head out for Jordan where tough moments are inevitable – I know I will need to be open and waiting to receive that faint breeze, to re-live that memory of snow-cones in the Issaquah Alps, and of course to enjoy my precious daily servings of Perpetuem.

{playing with Wilbur, the original RPF 'wells fargo wagon'. That idea didn't last long due to gas pump realties...but we've still got high hopes for future Wilbur projects...

All of those emotions soon proved reasonable. We made as many mistakes as successes, but we kept moving and spent the summer criss-crossing the west coast from marathon to marathon spreading the word of Run Pretty Far and this beautiful concept of love, color, joy & running.

In many ways, the last year has been like a long training run – some sections of grinding struggle, but a few minutes of bliss that make it all worth while.

In hind-sight, I wish I had appreciated the freedom of being on the road more last summer. Greg took the summer completely off and that was a rare opportunity. We ran in the Wasatch mountains, in a magical snow storm in Bryce Canyon, in the desert of Joshua Tree, and in the unbelievable beauty of Yosemite. And yet, despite all the awesomeness - I was usually stressed about all the nagging realities of starting a business.

{ Life is good at the top of Half Dome. Greg sporting his custom men's RPF tee. }

So here we are at our 1 year Anniversary… getting ready to head down to Eugene and start the summer road show again.  What are the emotions now?  Well, I’ll be honest – stress is still there. Apparently high-stress and risk tolerance are just part of owning a business. But the more prominent emotions are: anticipation, celebration, and gratitude.  I think that, just like the long run, the more times you do it, you learn that the inevitable moments of low struggle will come and go, but the journey is everything. We are blessed to be on this run and can’t wait to see where it will take us.

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In the spirit of our anniversary, we are offering free shipping on all orders this week.  And because all women should have the opportunity to start a business, go for a run, or just have a safe place to sleep – we are donating $3 from the purchase of every shirt to Jubilee Women’s Center in Seattle, WA.  Jubilee’s mission is to:

 provide women a safe and supportive place to live and an opportunity to learn while becoming self-reliant in housing and employment

We will keep the donation tally rolling THROUGH the Eugene Marathon and look forward to bringing a lot of Run Pretty Far love to Jubilee!

xoxo, Jenn

I couldn’t help but draft up this list of other ways to realize you’ve left polite society and now are in full-on goal mode.  For better or worse, each of these comes directly from my life in the last few weeks…

Top 10 Ways You Know You Are In Serious Training Mode:

1: When you see a huge bruise forming on your thigh and are overwhelmed with JOY that it’s just a bruise, not quad tendinitis (as feared).

2: When leftover Gu Chomps start looking like a totally normal dessert option.

3: When 2am seems like a perfectly acceptable time to sneak in the day’s run.

4: When the majority of your daily meals come from small foil packages filled with gel.

5: When you find yourself rummaging through the dirty clothes bin for the ‘least dirty’ of the dirty socks as your clean supply is long gone.

6: When you start looking at the door-frames in your house wondering if there is a way to do pull ups from them.

7: When showers start seeming like an inconvenience as you know you’re just going to get stinky again in the morning.

8: When you can never find your driver’s license because it’s still in one of your Nathan packs.

9: When you’re running through the neighborhood dragging a SUV tire behind you wondering why those weirdos are gaping at you from inside their cars.

10: When you disgust the grocery check-out girl by pulling a wet, sweat covered $20 bill out of your ziplock bag ‘purse’.

And for a BONUS # 11 that we can all relate too…

11: When as soon as your run is done, you start planning your next run, and repeat, and repeat.

{Me & Dave...just 2 crazy kids that like lists}

Happy Training! xoxo, Jenn

On the first day, I consciously started out slow, trekking with Greg a bit behind the other runners. I was ginger about a mild over-training injury, nursing a sinus infection, and generally just wanted to ease into the weekend.

Mid-day I found myself alone, hiking up a long steep sandy jeep road that went on for miles. Occasional SUV’s would blare past throwing up dust in my face and mocking me with their closed off air conditioned serenity. I heard my sister’s voice saying, “Have fun this weekend, if that’s what you call fun” from a voicemail I had listened to right before we started. A pitiful hour plus went by as I marched on – Greg was far behind me, but I couldn’t seem to catch up with the runners either. My attitude was sinking like the Titanic. I finally gave in and sat down to wait for Greg. When he finally found me on the side of the road, I was hot, grumpy, and doubting all my abilities. I always sound like a peach in these stories, huh?

{the line down the center of the landscape was my meltdown row}

A tuna sandwich, ibuprofen, Dayquil, some whining, and (most importantly) Greg’s wide brimmed hat jammed on my head formed the immediate roadside triage. Then he helped me tend to my feet, helped me stand up, and helped me get my pack on. Same old story – Greg helping me. But this was not the story I wanted anymore. We started out again painfully slow at first, but soon my energy came back and we picked up the pace. The brimmed hat was a lifesaver. Really, Jenn?  You needed Greg to remind you to protect your head, save yourself from mid-day heatstroke, and wear a flippin’ brim on a trek in the desert?? But I guess the answer was yes.

Soon we ran across Howard who let us know the group had gone in several different directions and no one else had exactly loved that last jeep road/canyon section either. Misery loves company and I instantly felt another notch better. Not long after that, I turned back into typical Jenn and left Greg in the dust with a wave, a smile, and his blessing. As is also typical, I got stronger as the day went on and loved running with the ‘big boys’ across the last miles of the evening. But the nagging thought kept coming back to me – once again Greg had to ‘help me up’. I didn’t want to need his help any more and more importantly, Greg wasn’t going to be in Jordan, so what would happen when I found myself sitting on the side of the road having a pity party? I needed to learn to pick myself up.

The rest of the training weekend was great. I felt confident, strong, and happy. But as we drove out of the park, the doubting thoughts came back. As I spilled out my fears, Greg said the same thing he has said to me, in different ways, so many countless times before…..

You are so much stronger than you know. You just have to believe in yourself. Everyone else can see this in you. Now see it in yourself. Believe, Jenn. Believe in yourself.

I’ve spent the last several months repeating that phrase to myself – You are so much stronger than you know. And trying to believe it. I’ve spent countless solo runs examining why I struggle with this. I’ve spent countless group runs questioning other woman who I can tell ‘do believe’. I poke and pry and try to figure out their secrets. I observed my first 100miler as a crew/pacer and watched several runners look inside to discover their strength. I have ‘good’ weeks where I slowly start to trust in what I can do, and then ‘bad’ weeks where the pressure of it all builds up and I have a melt down in fear. Silly old useless fear.

But not surprisingly for this girl who often lives in an imaginary world, it’s a line from a classic movie that has struck a chord in my heart and I think finally made the impact so needed.

Dorothy:  Oh, Will you help me? Can you help me?

Glinda, the Good Witch: You don’t need to be helped any longer, my dear. You’ve always had the power to go back to Kansas.

Dorothy: I have?

Scarecrow: Then why didn’t you tell her before?

Glinda, the Good Witch: Because she wouldn’t have believed me. She had to learn it for herself.

Dorothy has been on an epic journey, looking for answers in other people’s magic…but in the end she learns that everything she ever needed was already inside of her. It’s always been there….just waiting for that moment when we are ready to believe.

That nugget of wisdom as dispensed by the beautiful Glinda has been rocking my world the last few days.  Whatever you are chewing on, whatever you are working through….everything you need is already inside you. Difficult to access? Perhaps. But there?  I think so…

As I whittle down my Jordan pack to the final, bare essentials for success I’ve decided I somehow need to bring with me a little bit of red sparkle dust as a reminder to click my clunky Salomons and just Believe.

As always, I love too many of the answers so I used an online auto-generator this time. It picked # 95 (from 1-106). And the winner is … Jennifer Shaver

‎5am morning runs are keeping my positivity strong. I strap my headlamp on and sneak out before anyone is awake. I get the whole town to myself and as the sun comes up, the sky is surreal. And I have the world all to myself. I sneak back in the house before anyone is awake and it’s like a whole part of my day was my special retreat that is all my own.

Congrats Jennifer! Send me an email at jenn@runprettyfar.com and we’ll get your hat/visor in the mail.